Small Problems are Still Problems

Have you ever heard the quote "Someone's got it worse than you"?

You see, I think this saying is supposed to make me feel better about my own life.  To think "Eh, things are not as bad as they could be."

And indeed I know they can be worse, and maybe that makes it some-what better.  But that doesn't mean that things still aren't bad.

I understand in stepping back and getting a bit of perspective on your own life.  Sure, maybe something horribly tragic happened,  but at least you have some good still left, right? Maybe you're completely stressed out or anxious or upset, but someone out there has it rougher. I agree that things can always get worse,  but that doesn't mean I believe in the quote stated above.

If a someone is talking to you about their lifes troubles: if they just lost someone,  if they suffer from depression, if they open up to you in any way at all about their dark feelings, it is in no way okay to tell them:

"Straighten up.  Someone's got it way worse than you,  so stop pitying yourself."

Oh my goodness.

Please don't do this.

Sure someone has it way worse than you, and they should be in our Prayers daily,  but that doesn't mean your own problems and struggles and trials aren't just as real and important as theirs. 

We all suffer and we all feel like it's impossible to just stand up in the mornings sometimes, but because our problems aren't GROUND BREAKING CALL THE NEWS problems,  does not mean that they do not matter.

This does not mean that YOU do not matter.

Sometimes I tell myself to get a grip: 

"Why are you still crying?  Why do you still feel this way? Why are you still so upset when there are people out there witnessing death and destruction and perhaps fighting not to die themselves?"

And that works, to a degree. But sadness is selfish, and even if the whole world is ending it still finds the time to remind me of my little troubles in my little world.

I Pray for others everyday--for the people who are fighting for themselves, whether their enemy is big or small, because we all matter and maybe this problem won't kill you, but at the time it sure feels like it will, doesn't it?

It seems like if you aren't about to kill yourself, or about to kill someone else, no one cares.  As long as you aren't pushed that far to the edge, you should be fine, right?  You can get over it on your own.

But this isn't true and it's stupid to think it is.  

Speaking from my personal experience, handling it on your own is the hardest thing to do.  Thankfully I have wonderful people on my life who are supportive and caring towards me,  but I know that I'm lucky when it comes to this.  I know that most people don't, and that breaks my heart.

Don't let anyone belittle you and your sadness and your loss or your heartbreak or your trauma. 

I believe in understanding.  That's it.  I believe in listening to others and even if a struggle seems petty and useless, know that it's not. 

Like depression, for example.  Many people misunderstand it. 

You don't have to be on medicine or in therapy to be depressed.  To be 'Clinically Depressed' you do, but that's not the only form of depression.

But people think:

 "Are you tempted to kill yourself?  Have you stopped eating? No?  Then you can handle handle this.  You're fine."

No, because depression doesn't have to be so bad as to take you're own life for it to be real.

I am depressed,  for reference. I have no doubt about it.  It's better some days and worse others,  but more on that in a later post.

Take your own problems and other people's problems seriously, please, because they all are, yes, serious, big or small.

Ugh, just 'share the love', you know? 

Would you want to be ignored? Would you want to be shut down or not taken honestly and openly?


Okay then, get a grip and help out others, because that's literally one of the things you where put on this earth to do.

Thanks and have a great day.